Hermione's Plan
by Leremia C. Awan
Summary: Hermione has a few secrets, and she doesn't trust easy. But when PMS comes in severe contact with pricks, only doom, despair, and of course laughter can ensue. SevxHerms. Funny and Finished.
1. Chapter 1

**Inspired by many things.**

**Harry Potter and its characters are not mine nor do I have any right to them. **

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**Hermione's Plan**

It was Double Potions today and I felt the familiar tingling shrill go up my spine. '_Fuck I hate PMS, this is bullshit.' _I packed my books up as Ms. Prince gave me a time warning. As I walked down the hall I could hear snip-bits of information being spoken around me.

'Around me, never too me.'

As the Potions room door opened, I felt a wide hand shove me into the stone door-frame. Glancing back, Draco Malfoy stood there with a victorious smirk across his features. I straightened and gasped at the abrasive shock of pleasurable pain that shot down my arm and into my shoulder. I swung around as she sneered at my glare.

"Oh, what are you going to do, huh? What Mudblood?"

I felt my confidence leave me as he stepped daringly close. He laughed at me before knocking my books out of my arms. "That's what I thought."

I pulled my books back into my arms properly and followed them into the Potions room; late. I set my stuff down at my seat beside Harry. Leaning down, I whispered darkly. "Two more, I'll give this day two more chances before I call it quits."

Thump

I sighed and glanced at Harry. "One." He nodded solemnly as I turned away to the Slytherins.

"Hey Granger, it looks like your hair has it's own gravitational pull!" I felt my cheeks grow hot before I swung back around, whispering to myself.

"One of these days ferret . One of these days I'll tell you just exactly what I think of you; you sniveling, stuck up, cock sucking son of a b-"

"Ah now that Miss. Granger has decided to join us, we can start." I felt my face grow hot red at the sound of Snapes silky baritone behind me. He pushed my shoulders down; forcing me into my seat.

"I'm done, no more. I'm not going to do a pissing thing today." Harry nodded at me sadly before turning towards the front.

"Today we will be creating a True thought Potion. Miss. Granger, what is it?" I sighed solemnly before glancing over to Harry mischievously. Slumping in my chair and blinking up at the Potions Master blankly.

"Huh?"

I nearly lost my composure and smirked at his shocked face. _'God if I could get him alone...and tied up...'_ I leaned forward and set my breasts on the table, slumping forward in my seat. "Repeat the question I wasn't listening."

"That's news." I half turned my body to face Malfoy.

"Sorry, what was that Malfoy? I was ignoring you."

"What are the effects of the True Thought Potion, Miss. Granger?"

I swung back around and stared at him with a dead-pan look. Harry turned red with held back laughter. "I think-"

"You _think_. The-" He swished his wand at the board as he turned away from the class.

"Yes, I _think._ Unlike several other people in this room. Shocker, I know." I rested my head on my wrist as I let my eyes travel down his backside appreciatively. I sighed heavily before drumming my fingers. "The True Thought Potion or as originally called 'Meddyliau Potion Gwir' gives the consumer a visual projection of their thoughts in words or only their worded thoughts if wished. It was originally made for battle but it was proven nearly useless as it only stayed for less than three minute-"

"That is quite enough. The ingredients is on the board, Get started."

I pushed myself to stand up as I felt a paper ball hit my shoulder. Looking down, I unraveled it as I heard Malfoy snickering. I looked on the movement on the parchment as the picture of a female stick figure putting something into a caldron and it exploding. Grinning I slid my chair back in and turned to face Malfoy, paper in hand. I felt Harry grab my wrist before letting go quickly.

Smiling sheepishly at Harry I glanced back a Malfoy.

"I have to do this. Enjoy it Harry, you'll love it.

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**Short and sweet XD**


	2. Chapter 2

**Inspired by many things.**

**Harry Potter and its characters are not mine nor do I have any right to them. **

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**Hermione's Plan**

**Chapter Two: Ink**

I swished past Malfoy as I pressed my wand to the tip of my finger. "Accio ink-well."

I watched sadistically as Professor Snapes ink-well flew across the room and splattered noisily on Malfoy. I heard his quick steps, I turned to him with a sarcastic smile and began to play with my wand.

"Miss. Granger! Thirty points from Gryffindor."

I nodded before my eyes caught sight of Pansy Parkingson and her untied shoelace. I saw Harry follow my line of sight before shaking his head at me fervently. I nodded again at Snape( Who was still in front of me) and smirked. Flicking my wand, I saw his eyes widen in shock yet again before Parkingson crashed onto her face and the spilt ink. "Detention Miss. Granger."

He walked away as I opened my mouth to speak. He didn't even wait for a response and it irked me. I bent down low at the waist in an extravagant bow. "Anything else, your Highness?"

He swung back around so fast I was nearly scared for my life. "I will not be mocked in my own classroom." He narrowed his eyes before smirking. '_Oh god, that's sexy._' "Since you so badly want to be the classes attention today, you can be the demonstration."

I was confused for barely a moment before he revealed a small vile filled with a green metallic liquid. I took it before uncorking the top and wafting the contents. I heard his sigh as I shifted it to check the consistency. "I would not poiso-"

I shook my head before bringing it to my lips. "I know, but accidents happen." Tossing it back, I felt the slime burning my throat before the sting moved toward my temples.

_'Oh god! That tastes like shit...'_

I heard the class gasp and titter as the words were projected in front of me in gassy blue letters.

_'Great, now those bumbling idiots can see everything...'_

I shut my eyes tightly before I heard Snapes voice enter my mind.

"Open your eyes Miss. Granger."

I opened my eyes to see bold letters hanging in the air.

_'As you wish, My lord Git...'_

I heard Snape growl and approach me before turning to the class. "Would anyone like to know what Miss. Golden Girl thinks of them?" Several hands went up.

_'No.'_

"Do what you're told Granger!" I smirked and focused on Malfoy. "Miss. Granger, nothing vile." I raised my eyes to Snapes before he continued sarcastically. "If you will."

I felt my smile grow as I slowly shook my head.

_'Not going to happen, I don't want to be nice.'_

"Prove it Granger! Tell me how you _really_ feel." Malfoy taunted. I turned back to him and hopped up gracefully onto his desk.

_'I find that every time I look at you, it gives me the creeps. I can't even stand to be near you without choking back bile. I think you are, by far, the most loathsome, stupid, insufferable, cock-sucking son of a bastard that has ever breathed a breath of un-cleanliness.'_

I heard the quick steps come up behind me before the book rapped sharply against the back of my head.

"I said nothing vile." I put my hand up to the spot on the back of my head where he hit. Pleasure thrummed through my veins and I could feel it.

"Sit down." I sat down as he swept past me and threw Harry a wicked grin before glancing at a flushed Malfoy.

_'You know Malfoy, the first part of that can't be said for your father...'_

I heard whispers as I watched Malfoy pale considerably. I jolted when a book rapped yet again on the back of my head. Looking up I saw Snape scowling down at me before his eyes widened. I looked up and went pale. Green letters floated innocently in the air.

**_'Do it again, we like it.'

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**_Love._**


	3. Chapter 3

**Inspired by many things.**

**Harry Potter and its characters are not mine nor do I have any right to them. **

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**Hermione's Plan**

**Chapter Three: Laughter**

I shot out of my seat and swished the vibrant words away. My hands moving in quick repetitive movements in the air.

_'No! Shut up!'_ I furrowed my eyes at my textbook on my desk; spacing out.

_**'No, I won't. You love it; you always have, you always will-'**_

_'I said shut up! There are people here, people who don't need to know you exist! I-'_ the pain returned and the reseeded. I plopped down into my seat with a dramatic huff, too embarrassed to look up. It was silent after for what seemed forever before Malfoy's broke its tension.

"So let me get this straight." He took a deep breath. "You have a foul mouth, the hots for both Snape and my father, you are a Masochist, _and_ you hear voices."

I shifted my eyes to Harry, who was trying and failing not to laugh, in a slight question. He shrugged, so in turning back to Malfoy, I stared to nod, but my eyes caught Snapes. He raised his eyebrow mockingly with a sneer on his lips. I smirked and turned back to Malfoy with mischief on my mind.

"I don't hear voices; there is just someone else in my head." I circled back into my chair properly and kept my eyes down-cast.

"Finnish your Potions and turn them in. Two foot essay next class on why it works. Find the reference page when you're finished."

Xxx

I watched everyone pass me to turn theirs in before Malfoy nudged me. "Not done yet Granger?"

_'Oh god, just leave me alone.'_

I scoffed and pointed behind me at Snapes desk. "Mine's the first vile. I've _been _done." I shoved my chair out and sat on the table with my feet cradled on it.

He looked confused before I held up my wand. He smirked and his eyes danced. "Very Slytherin."

I shrugged and rolled my eyes; smiling. He was looking at Harry who was at Snapes desk.

"Could have been." He didn't have time to register and response because I spoke again quickly. "He doesn't even know it's there."

Malfoy glanced ahead of me again and chuckled. "Does now, look."

_'Oh shit, like I haven't done enough today?'_

I slowly glanced behind me to see Snape furrowing his brows at me. "Miss. Granger, Where is your vile?"

I sighed and walked up to his desk. Leaning over I pulled out the first one. "Here." I put it back and turned away before he spoke.

_'I will not have foolish wand waving in this class.'_

"I will not have foolish wand waving in my class." Not turning around I spoke informatively.

_'Damn one word.'_

"So very sorry, Professor. I like it quick when I get impatient." I saw Harry's eyes widen before he started to laugh.

"Yeah, she does!" I blushed hard as I sat down and got out my quill and parchment to begin my essay. Then Harry watched as Snape moved gracefully towards the back of the room; past us. He cleared his throat roughly. "So Hermione, do you still like blood with sex, or no?"

_'Oh goddess.'_

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**_Love._**


	4. Chapter 4

**Inspired by many things.**

**Harry Potter and its characters are not mine nor do I have any right to them. **

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**Hermione's Plan**

**Chapter Four: That's Just Great**

My eyes widened before clenching shut. _'Oh my Goddess, he didn't hear, he didn't hear.'_

**_'Yes, he did.'_** I opened my eyes. His footsteps had stopped. Smirking at the twin smile in Harry's eyes, I set down my quill forcefully but silently. "Well, Harry Potter! Who told you such a thing?"

He shrugged. "Good guess?"

"Spot on but," I leaned over, closer to him. "Only for those who I have the 'hots' for."

I mimicked Malfoy's voice while putting my fingers for quotation marks. Harry smiled widely before simmering it down to a smirk and put his arms around me. I was slightly confused before he whispered into my ear. "Trust me and play along, like we do this all of the time." I nodded. "When I pull away, I want you to giggle."

I wasn't sure what he was doing but when he pulled away from me a giggle escaped my mouth. "I am shocked Hermione. I think he might like whips. Don't know about Malfoy's dad though." I played my part well and huffed with a cross of my arms.

"I know, but there is no harm in dreaming."

"Knowing you Herms, it'll become one." I smiled as Snape took a shaky step forward. _'He's forcing himself not to listen.' _"I don't know what it is."

Harry was grinning at me, he noticed it too. "Teacher fetish? No, Malfoy's no teacher." He paused. "Bad boy syndrome?"

I nodded before shaking my head quickly. "Snape's a good guy." Then it hit me and I sat straight sharply. "I got it! Power."

I looked at Harry excitedly. "I like having no control, but knowing they will stop if I say so. Not to mention they're both hot enough for leather, chocolate, and ice."

"So you are really interested in my father?" I looked up past Harry and met Malfoy's eyes with a smile.

"Of course. Long blond hair, ice blue eyes, deadly large hands, what more could I need?" I shrugged as Malfoy passed Harry.

"Is this who you really are?"

I looked up at him before standing and putting my lips to his ear. "The hat nearly put me into Slytherin and I know it, but I am too brazen and I don't have the patients like you Slytherins do, right?"

I pulled back and grinned at him. "You got a thing for Harry, don't you?"

I watched in amusement as he stumbled over himself to act grossed out. I reached forward and pulled down his collar to expose a lightning bolt tattoo. As his shoulders slumped, I grinned down at a happy but blushing Harry.

"See Harry, I told you he would like you too." I turned away as the boys made eye contact, but said nothing. I swept past Snape before looking back at Harry. "Grab my shit would you Harry?"

"Miss. Granger, Detention at eight Friday." I shrugged at Snape before looking at Harry.

"Finally got him alone, fun."

I continued cleaning my mess as the clock chimed. Class was over, and everyone was leaving. I reached for the door as the lost shuffled out. That is, until Snapes voice cut through the air. "And what do you think you're doing?"

I turned and felt lust whip through my body. "The Library, want to come?"

I never though he would, or that Malfoy would tell his dad.

Oh my, that was a fun night.

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**Love.**


	5. Authors note sorry I hate these too

**Inspired by many things.**

Just to clear cobwebs...

Draco told his dad that Hermione had the hots for him and Severus. So, using your imagination, he confronts her while her and Severus get jiggy. he ends up joining in one way or another, or later. Your choice.

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**Love.**


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